Fliss Bliss

You tried to arrive before the party had started.
But neither of us were truly ready.
And so we waited.

On the morning of your arrival (months later),
I awoke disbelieving that the waves that rolled through me
Were the real deal.
Before long there was no denying.
You were on your way.

Our plans to greet you naturally
Were soon set aside.
As your curious nature
Drew you to peek down the exit.

You were pulled from my belly
With scalpels and forceps.
And with a tiny cry
You were placed forever in my heart.

Happy first birthday my sweet girl.

Adopting the pace of nature

Last week I spent seven days with my in-laws at a cottage. To clarify, there were 17 people (including five teenagers and two children) and two dogs with one kitchen and two bathrooms. Sounds like a disaster doesn't it?! Especially considering that every day I'm becoming more like my mother in that I REALLY enjoy my alone time every day.

Before we left, as we matriarchs tried to figure out the logistics of feeding and sleeping this army, I had a mini breakdown about it all. I was envisioning a tiny cabin, a rained out week, two miserable children, and one completely mental me. To be honest, I was dreading this "vacation." As we pulled away from our home on Saturday in our car with no AC, I was in a complete funk. I was sure that I'd have to insult the entire clan by leaving early to retain my sanity.

And then we arrived. While the rain pattered around us, we pulled up to this amazing cottage and I felt my spirits rise.

The great room was huge, baby-friendly, and with wipeable leather furniture. The kitchen was large and industrial, there were two fridges and a huge gas cooker. Our bedroom was bright and spacious with a king sized bed and room for Fliss' play yard and Hayden's Diego bed. It also had a door onto a great balcony - the perfect, quiet alone space I had feared lost! And the path to the water? No steep stairs, no jagged rocks, just pebbles and sand leading to a perfect sandy weed-free beach!

I quickly unpacked our bags and cooler and began to feel myself relax. As the other families arrived, I expected my anxiety to return. And yet, I remained completely chilled. Everyone was so happy to be there, so respectful of each other (yes, even the teenagers), that we all easily came together as one huge family. We cooked together, played together, cleaned together, shared kid-watching duties, fished, gazed at the fire in a huge circle....it was like being at Bronte Creek again, only with my extended family.

I surprised myself with how harmonious I felt with my cottage-mates. Instead of stressing over people eating Fliss' special gluten-free food, I roasted marshmellows and played king of the dock, I drank too much wine and caught the first big fish of the trip. I was too busy having fun to worry.

Adam's family tends to have a mantra of "things will just work out" which usually goes against my mantra of "plan for everything so you're not surprised." This past week, I witnessed and experienced just how relaxing going with the flow can be. Truly, with memories like these:



the only word I can summon for my family vacation is bliss.

Beware the nudie police!

Me (on the way to school this morning): Look Hayden! That police man pulled someone over.

Hayden: Oh yeah! I bet he's getting a ticket. He must have been speeding. *long pause* ....or getting naked!


That's my boy!

Mom really does know best!

Mompreneurs are my new favourite people! When I don't know what to buy someone or I need something out of the ordinary, a mompreneur has helped me out every time! Recently I've worked with three different mompreneurs who have blown me out of the water with their products and service! I need to rave about them here and encourage my dear readers to try them too!

My first satisfying mom-based purchase was from Debby of Otter Babies. Debby makes cloth diapers that are unrivaled for their ingenious design and super cute patterns. Otter Blotters are my new favourite cloth diapers! I'd totally switch our stash over completely if I had the cash. If you cloth diaper your kids, or are looking into it, check out her diapers for sure! They have a hidden velcro closure that allows for fast diaper changes without the annoyance of diaper chains in the laundry. Plus the inserts dry quickly, absorb a ton, and you can customize them however you want!

When Debby's latest design didn't fit my needs perfectly, she paid to have the cover sent back, repaired it, and then she returned the cover to me with another FREE cover for my troubles! You can't beat that kind of personal service!

Fliss in one of her Otter Blotters!

Michelle from GEM Cloths is my next favourite super mompreneur. Michelle makes reusable feminine mama cloth menstrual pads. The thought of mama cloth turned me off at first, but I soon realized that it was really no different than cloth diapering. Plus I could benefit from the same chemical-free comfort that Fliss enjoys! I was leery to spend all sorts of money on pads that might not work for me, when some friends pointed me Michelle's way.

For $35, Michelle made me what she calls a "grab bag." It contained pretty much all the mama cloth I'll need for a cycle. And hello! They are gorgeous and so super soft!! I was actually looking forward to my monthly so I could try them out! I can tell you that I didn't have one leak, one shift, and no "diaper rash" like I get from regular menstrual products. I highly recommend all women try these wonderful alternatives! Michelle is wonderful to work with and helped this mama cloth newbie to know exactly what I was looking for, how many, and how to care for them. Plus she's a super nice lady to boot!

A few of the gorgeous mama cloths from my grab bag!

My third momprenuer superstar is one that is local to me. Kristen, of Eaton Family EcoBabies helped me to make the jump to be an exclusively cloth diapering family. Through her free diaper workshop (which I recommend to anyone who wants to cloth diaper or who has started but wants to learn more), I got the complete low down on just how diverse the cloth diaper industry is! She helped to demystify washing routines, options (like prefolds - though I still suck at them), and helped me to understand the pros and cons of different fabrics available. Kristen has an AWESOME loaner program as well, that we plan to use for our next bundle of joy (before baby can fit into our stash)!

Kristen is the guru of more than just diapers though. She is pretty much responsible for helping this crunchy mama to be even more earth friendly. She sold me my first Diva Cup, child ear protection (for Hayden's super sensitive ears - seriously, these are amazing!), teething amber, all natural sunscreen, and so much more. Adam has actually implemented an EcoBabies budget because I always find something I love while I'm there!

Hayden wearing his Baby Banz ear protectors at the Canada Day parade!

So the next time you're struggling with a unique gift, or looking for something different for yourself, I urge you to drive past the Walmarts and Home Depots of the world. Search out the little guys who can give you phenomenal customer service without ever having to leave your house! And if you do decide to buy from any of the fabulous ladies above, tell them Lucy sent you!

We need a prefold - STAT!

Today I had to take Fliss to the hospital for what turned out to be a Urinary Tract Infection (or UTI). She'd been feverish for the past few days but today she really seemed to be going downhill. It was your standard hospital visit full of waiting and tests and trying to keep a baby occupied for hours on end without being allowed to crawl on the floor or touch anything. Another germaphobe mum's nightmare.

I think what really stood out for me on this particular visit was the nurses' reaction to Fliss wearing cloth diapers. Those ER nurses probably see hundreds of kids in a month and all three of Felicity's nurses said that they had never seen cloth diapers on a baby before. Each one asked me all kinds of questions about them and the youngest nurse asked for a little tutorial.

It was a sad and proud moment all at once. Sad because it made me realize how few parents in my area actually use cloth. And proud because I'm doing something for my daughter that not only benefits her sensitive skin, but also benefits the planet that she'll be living on long after I die. I happily touted the benefits of cloth to all the nurses and even encouraged the youngest nurse (who seemed the most interested) to suggest that the pediatric ward supply cloth along side the disposables. Yup, that's me - super mum; Saving my daughter and random baby bums all at once!

As a side note to you, gentle readers: If you've never thought about or tried cloth diapering, I urge you to take the leap. I was skeptical at first with thoughts of swishing poopy diapers and my house reeking of soiled cloth, but it really involves none of that. It's nearly as easy as disposables with none of the scary chemicals or the constant output of cash! I also have NEVER had an up-the-back-ewww-gross-total-blow-out poop with cloth. I had them at least once a week with disposables! (Plus, on a totally superficial level, it is awesome to coordinate Felicity's diapers with her outfits! )

Forgotten promises

When I was about 10 years-old, I swore that when I had my own kids, I would never answer the question why with "because I said so." I hated that inane response and never wanted to subject my children to it. This was long before I encountered the tenacity of a preschooler.

Me: Eat your dinner.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because it will make you strong and healthy.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because food is full of vitamins and nutrients that your body needs to grow.
Hayden: Why
Me: Because you don't want to stay 3ft tall forever.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because then you won't be able to reach your own plate or brush your teeth without a stool.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because you'll be too short because you didn't eat your dinner.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because you were too busy asking questions.
Hayden: Why?
Me: Because you're crazy.
Hayden: Why?
Me: *snap* BECAUSE I SAID SO!

Outlook and insight, sacrifice and priorities

I'm a big believer in fate, but also that you are in control of your own destiny. Life can throw you all sorts of challenges and choices. It's how you react and respond to these that shape your everyday life. Your attitude and openness can either make or break you.

I know people who have been through the wringer and faced seemingly insurmountable obstacles and yet they face each day with a smile and carry on. I also know people who are blessed beyond belief, but who are so focused on what they don't have that they see life as a frustrating daily struggle.

I choose to see my life as one filled with blessings. I have an amazing family who support me and raised me with love. I have a tender husband who fulfills my every need and walks beside me through all our highs and lows. I have two wonderful children who amaze me daily with their love and innocence. And I have a small circle of absolutely incredible friends who are there through thick and thin. They have given me the gift of true friendship..

Recently, I had to shut the door (hopefully temporarily) on one of my dreams: to be a stay at home mum. Adam and I had been working towards the possibility by reviewing our finances and making some changes. The very idea of it made me giddy. But with the economy the way it is, and with Adam running his own business (read: no benefits, WSIB, or unemployment insurance) it's just too risky to put all our eggs in one basket right now.

I've been mourning the loss of my idyllic life. It was as if I'd received a rejection letter in the mail from a dream job. "Dear Lucy, thank you for your interest, but..." I could feel myself slipping into a negative head space. Focusing on all that I couldn't have. Wallowing in self pity for a dream put on hold. Feeding an anger towards all that was preventing me from attaining my WAHM status. Resentment that others had attained what I could not. But the fates wouldn't have it. They intervened.

Today I stopped in to work to have lunch with one of my coworkers. While there, I fell into a conversation with another colleague (and fellow blogger). What started as a light conversation soon became a discussion about outlook and insight, sacrifice and priorities. Perhaps without even knowing it or meaning to, she helped me to turn a corner in my thinking. She helped me to remember that everything in life happens for a reason. What creates your character and determines your quality of life is how you address and respond to these changes.

While I still hold dear my deep desire to stay at home and raise my children full time, today I am focusing on what I do have to look forward to as a career woman:

• a well paying job to return to
• coworkers who challenge my thinking and creative abilities
• benefits that allow us to never have to worry about health care for our family
  
• a safe, caring daycare where my children will be together
  
• the extra finances to be able to pay off our debts and build our savings so that some day soon I CAN stay home
• adult conversation on a daily basis that does not involve any bodily functions
• an opportunity to keep expanding my education and learning
• a reason to wear more than sweatpants and tanks
  

And so dear readers, I am back to my optimistic self. I know how blessed I am.

Have you counted your blessings today?